So I'm getting pretty sick of the situation between my housemate and that guy. Our other friends are starting to notice and are starting to talk. They're not happy either. Another friend sent her a text telling her to 'be careful'. But she didn't take the text seriously at all. They're still sleeping in her room every night with the door locked, they hang out 24/7. Wendy is feeling uncomfortable with him around all the damn time. I just want to ask him straight out when he's going to start paying rent.

So I was talking to another friend, she said that she heard that his little sister tell another girl that her brother had a girlfriend. This other girl happened to be a friend's little sister. So it eventually travelled to me. She's not a stupid girl, her brother would have had to say something to her for her to tell her friend that. There's also something else, I thought that all this time she didn't think of him in that way. Then I heard that she admitted to another friend end of last year that she had developed some sort of feelings. Now I understand how complicated it really is. But I still can't help but not be very happy with them. She has no bloody self control. Neither does he. I know supposedly you can't help who you fall in love with, but you can help the bloody situation. They should have stopped this before it happened. Yeah. Cause sleeping with each other every night really helps. I think I have lost a lot of respect for her. And it's sad, because she's one of my first and best friends here.

It's like I didn't even have those four months of holidays. I come back, and everything picks up as it was. I don't like what's happening between my roommate and one of her guy friends. I know she doesn't feel anything more then sibling love, but the way he looks at her and acts...it's kind of disturbing. He knows she's engaged. He's met her fiance before too. Actually, I don't know if he's still her fiance...she's still hesitant on getting married to him. But she hasn't officially broken up with him or anything. Her fiance probably doesn't know that anything is wrong.

Just the way he touches her makes me uncomfortable and annoyed at him. I was neutral towards that guy, but now I'm starting to really not like him. My roommate should also know better. It's 12:53am here right now, and he's over, and they're both in her room. He slept over every night last year in her room. I trust her enough to know that they're not doing anything, but that doesn't make it right. It's hard for me to not be judgemental and to stay out of it because it's really not my business, but for it to be displayed in front of your face 24/7 is something else. He should know to leave her alone. She should know not to lead him on. It's wrong. I saw him hug her from behind and kiss her somewhere on her face before in the kitchen and it made me realise how uncomfortable and disgusted I was at this. I never realised how strongly I felt, but now it's getting out of control. It'll never be my place to confront them about any of this, so instead I'm on here, saying all the things I wish I could have said to them this afternoon.

Stay Young, Go Dancing

I don't understand how people can post up douchey statements on Facebook thinking that they're being all wise and clever about the world. Little quotes from god knows where, or if they're feeling really creative, they write their own stupid thing about 'love'. And then there are the people who 'like' the statuses. It'd be more understandable if you were 14 BUT YOU'RE ALL AT LEAST TWENTY YEARS OLD NOW. GET OVER YOURSELVES. Obviously, I could block the annoying, BUT THEN I WOULD BE BLOCKING 50% OF PEOPLE ON MY FACEBOOK. WHY ARE PEOPLE MAKING IT SO EASY FOR ME TO DISLIKE THEM. Maybe I need a break from Facebook.

Keep Me High

This afternoon I was hanging around in the outside while my mum was doing gardening, and we got talking. I was sort of complaining about the fact that I will probably never find someone, and that all my friends have boyfriends now. It was strange, she was actually giving me some sort of modern age boy advice. That if I wait, he'll probably come along when I least expect it. That he's probably out there somewhere. I felt like it was a moment out of some white middle aged woman's novel, where the sun is setting so it's reddening the sky with the summer crickets calling, my mum is doing the gardening and I'm hanging around, under some vines in the shade. Next thing there'll probably be some family crisis where it brings the entire family together, to strengthen relationships between sisters or some crap like that.

I don't think I can say that these summer holidays were particularly memorable, but it wasn't the worst I've ever had either. Going to QLD with my family was probably one of the highlights, and so was starting a birthday tradition with friends. It's a bit crazy when I think that I'm entering my third year as a uni student, when I'm still having these warped high school dreams. I don't know whether it's hinting that secretly I'm missing high school or that it's now symbolism for something in my life. Two years have gone by too quickly. IT'S ALIENS I TELLS YA.

Why is it that it's only late at night that the things I really don't give a crap about during the day, suddenly magnifies and explodes in my head past 12am? Mostly in a shit load of guilt coupled with regret. That I don't want to fall asleep purely because I seem to always be trying to grasp onto remnants of a day that didn't turn out too badly. Or because I hope to prolong a day so that whatever I'm not looking forward to remains that one extra hour further away. Also an extra idiotic hour of mulling over all the horrible things I've done and said, and maybe if things had been different, I wouldn't be spending so much time thinking about it.

In the Morning

When I first came out here, I was under the impression that the Ag kids, aka farm kids, were tough and didn't do emotional crap. It was probably a generalisation, but from watching their drunkenness and brash personalities, it's hard to think otherwise. A friend was telling me about how she's been friends with this guy called Max for a while now who used to go to uni here last year. She was telling me he's an incredibly nice guy who now works on a farm close by. My friend said he would come out to uni just to visit her, and she knew he liked her. A few days ago they were sitting in her common room watching TV when he said 'I love you' to her. To make it clear, they aren't dating or anything. She didn't know what to say, freaked out, and kicked him out of her building with a quick excuse of needing to study. Now they haven't spoken in a week. She told me that farm guys are one of the most emotional, soppy kind of guys out there.

She had a friend who was seeing a farm guy for two months before he told her he wanted to marry and have kids with her. The breaking point was when his mother called her and asked when she had free time to come help redecorate the house on the farm to how she wanted it since she'd be 'living there in the future'. TWO MONTHS. The girl broke up with him and he cried.

Telephone

Sometimes I wish I had been rebellious in high school. Even slightly. Anything. Whenever I talk to Sheenal, we always end up talking about our past, and she was a massive rebel. She has had the most interesting teenage life, bloody hell.

She was telling me how just before the end of year 12, she and her friend, Sky, did this horrendously 'Mean Girls' kind of thing to these two girls who annoyed them. I get the impression Sheenal was one of those girls in school. Anywho, they were at the library when they drew up this poster. The poster said 'Casual Sex Wanted. Willing to do anything, called Sexy Shaz or Nasty Natalie' (something along that) with the mobile phones of those two girls attached. They made multiple copies of these and put them on P plater windscreens, in mail boxes, everywhere. So those girls began wondering why they started getting phone calls, asking for casual sex. Sheenal told me they made a mistake of placing one of the fliers in a different friend's mail box. Sky's handwriting was distinctive so they worried that they would get caught, so they decided to get into the house, distract him and steal the flier back. The only reason Sheenal brought it up was because Sky had just found one of the fliers again and sent her a picture.

Man, this is what teenage soap dramas are made of. She's lived that teenage life that we see in The O.C. and whatever. She's had a stalker down the road who used to use binoculars to spy on her, a hot neighbour who saw her climb into her window in her PJ shorts because she accidentally locked herself out of the house, lived in FIJI for the first few years of her life, and who knows what else. Her friend Sky by the way, now owns and runs these 5 star hotels on Surfer's Paradise, given to her by her family. How do these people have lives like this? And where can I get one for myself?